This will be a short post. This is an important article, because it highlights an aspect of necessary church self-defense that I hadn't thought of. I had thought of the move of only allowing your church to be used for weddings for members. Check.
But "Darwin Catholic" points out that, if you turn a blind eye to members living as same-sex couples, that will also be used against you in a discrimination suit if the church refuses to let those members use the church facilities for a wedding and refuses to perform the wedding.
This is extremely important, and I haven't heard anyone say it yet. The helpful summary of ways to protect your church at this link does mention church discipline and the importance of a clear church discipline policy, but it needs to be driven home that your church has to carry out that church discipline, not just have it on paper.
This is especially important for the see-no-evil crowd who say you are "dirty minded" if you think it's a cause of scandal for two men to be openly homosexual and living together. (I've written about this at the end of the entry here, for example.) Now I see that doing so could also render the church open to lawsuit. If that homosexual "couple," members of your church, that everyone was pretending were living together in a chaste relationship ("You nasty judgemental bigot, how dare you ask whether they're actually chaste it's none of your business shut up") then asks to get "married" and Fr. Wishy-Washy won't "marry" them, I really doubt it's going to be much of a defense in court to say, "We were giving them the benefit of the doubt and assuming they had no intention of having a sexual relationship, Your Honor. This request for a wedding took us completely by surprise." They will be prima facie "gay" members of your church in good standing. Your church's policy will be to let members in good standing use the church for weddings. You are nonetheless discriminating against them. Ergo, you are not abiding by your own church policies and are discriminating. Ergo, you deserve to be sued for all you're worth. QED.
Church discipline in such cases is therefore no longer optional. "Don't ask, don't tell" is no longer a viable church policy. A thought worth pondering.